Not Alone (a Ponyboy X Johnny story)
by D.M.Bradley-Whittaker
Summary: After Johnny and Ponyboy finally confess to each other, the only thing that they're worried about is the people who will try to pull them apart. (contains the following: BoyXBoy, rape. Don't like, don't read.)
1. Confessions

Fourteen year old Ponyboy and sixteen year old Johnny sat in their favorite abandonded car at the junkyard. There was a silence between them in which they just stared at the sky. They watched as the clouds rolled by that Saturday afternoon and enjoyed the comfort of each other's presence.

Johnny stared at the sky but he didn't really see it. No, instead he was thinking of a way to tell Ponyboy about himself. Little did he know that Ponyboy was doing the same thing. Pony had a lot on his mind.

"Pony, I-I got to tell you something."

"Huh, what is it, Johnny Cakes?" Johnny, like always, blushed at his nickname that Pony gave him.

"Ummm...Well..." How was he supposed to say this. "I, umm, I love you, Pony."

Wide-eyed, Pony just looked at him. Oh no, did Johnny do something wrong? What if Pony didn't feel the same way? Or worse, what if Pony didn't accept him?

Pony grabbed Johnny by the chin and kissed him.

_'Oh god, his lips are so soft. Just like I'd always imagine,'_ both boys thought to themselves.

Ponyboy broke it off saying, "I love you, too, Johnny Cakes."

The boys sat in the car for a little while longer, thinking about what had just happened, and in the little space between them, they held each other's hands.

* * *

As the sun started to merge with the horizon, the boys walked back home, a little closer than usual and their smiles gleamed almost as bright as the sun.

Johnny's smile faltered little when he heard the screams and yells from his house. He didn't want to go back home to that. Who knew what would happen? "Pony, can I stay at your place tonight?" As soon as Johnny saw Pony's blush, he realized what his words meant. Johnny just blushed at the thought.

"Sure, I know that Darry wouldn't mind. He thinks of you as family." The rest of the walk home was in silence but the boys didn't mind. They were happy that they have finally confessed to each other. Pony had been planning on telling Johnny that he loved him for a couple of months now. Johnny knew that he loved Pony after he had gotten beaten up by the Socs. Pony had always been there to nurse him back to health, protect him, or even stand up for him. They envaded each others dreams every night. But, now that their dream was coming true, they wondered how it would really be.

The only problem that could stand in their way at the moment was society. It was the 60's and nobody accepted people who was a homosexual. But, what did it matter? They were already outcasts. The real problem was if the gang would accept them. They were family to them and it would hurt if they didn't liked their relationship.

As they got to the front porch, they could hear the gang in the living room, watching TV. When they stepped in the house, everyone said 'hey', or 'hi'. They were too engrossed to what ever was on the screen.

Darry must have came home a little while ago because he was walking down the stairs, with his hair still damp from his shower. "Darry, Johnny is going to stay with us tonight, ok?"

"Ok. I'll have someone come and get you when dinner is done. It will be a while." Darry shuffled into the kitchen and started pulling out pots and pans for dinner.

"Ok. Johnny, Let's go upstairs." Pony grabbed him by the hand and dragged him upstairs to Pony's room.

Locking the door behind them, they sat on oppiside sides the bed. Slowly, they inched towards one another and took each other hand once again. They stared into each other's eyes, leaning closer into each other. Their lips gently touched, before crashing into each other. They both wanted this, they both felt as if they needed this. They couldn't just live on fantasies forever. They needed something to hold on to, something to always remember.

Johnny unbuttoned Pony's shirt before sliding both his shirt and jacket off of his shoulders and to the ground. Johnny's denim jacket was thrown on the floor too. Pushing Johnny down on the bed, Ponyboy kissed him furiously, but it wasn't enough. He wanted more. He wanted to hear Johnny.

In one swift movement, Pony rolled Johnny's shirt off of him and threw in to the ground. The fourteen year old kissed his neck, leaving his mark. Johnny was his and his only. No one could steal him away. Traveling lower, Pony played with his nipples - teasing them, licking them, sucking them. It was enough to make the sixteen year old's breath caught in his throat. He was trying to supress the urge to moan. "Let it out. No one will hear us. Besides, I want to hear your sexy voice." Pony played with him for a little longer before Johnny finally let it out. He moaned and it made Pony hard just listening. Johnny arched his back, demanding more, demanding to be closer to his lover.

Lowering his gaze, Pony saw the huge scar on Johnny's stomach. It stretched from about the middle of his left ribcage, diagonally, to his right side where it dissappearing into his pants. Pony knew that it went on to the top his thigh. It made him mad just thinkning that there was nothing that he could do to stop his dad. Looking at the scar made him sad, because he knew Johnny must be suffering a lot. As tears fell, Pony traced his tongue and lips on the boy's scar. His lover shivered at the touch, but was also sad inside because he knew how much it hurts Pony to look at it. Johnny's tears fell,too. Both of them shouldn't have to endure this pain. But it would be a burden to carry something like that by oneself.

Johnny sat up and held Pony's face. "Please don't cry," he said as he lick the befallen tears and kissed each of his cheeks. "Don't be sad," he said as his kissed his lover's lips. Johnny lowered him to the bed and quickly started to please his former best friend. He wanted to show Pony how much he loved him, how much he cared. "Please stop hurting." With his teeth, Johnny unbuttoned the younger boy's pants and unzippered them. Pony moaned when he wasn't so constricted.

Pushing the rest of their clothes to the ground, they were naked and exposed to one another. Pony could see the rest of Johnny's scars, his wounds. _'Where do they end?'_ As soon as one scar ended, another began.

Kissing Pony softly, Johnny said, "It's going to be ok. Just relax." Pony settled down onto the bed.

Licking one of his fingers, Johnny pushed it in to Pony. Discomfort clearly shown on his face.

After a while Pony got used to the motions. "Are you ready for another one?" The fourteen year old nodded. Pushing another finger in, Pony gasped and squeezed the sheets beneath him, arching his back.

"Johnny Cake, would you just do it already?"

Johnny positioned himself at his lover's entrance before pushing inside. Pony was tight and wet, and it felt really good. It was more really that an dream he had ever had. It was ecstasy for him but it didn't look that way for Pony. He looked like he was in pain. "Pony, are you ok?" He nodded, but the way he looked didn't leave the sixteen year old so sure.

He thursted a little of himself at a time. A moan escaped Pony's lips. _'Did I hit his sweet spot?'_

"Johnny, that feels so good," Pony moaned. "Go faster."

_'I guess I did.'_ With a grin on his face the older boy was more than happy to fullfill his lover's wish. So both of them was panting and moaning. It sounded so sexy when Pony cried out Johnny's name. He wanted to hear more from him.

Johnny grabbed the younger boy's shaft and stroked it in time with his thrusts.

"Johnny Cake, I love you so much," Pony moaned before they both came.

Exiting out of his lover, Johnny kissed him, tenderly and lovingly. "I love you too."

They laid in each other's embrace, resting for a little bit. Their fingers intwined as Johnny said, "Are you still hurting?"

"A little bit. But I'm ok, really."

The sixteen year old kissed his forehead, murmuring against his skin, "I'm sorry. I tried to be as gentle as possible."

"Don't worry about it."

After a small silence in each other's arms, Pony said, "Dinner should be done soon. We should clean up."

As they cleaned up, Johnny noticed that Pony was walking funny. _'Oh man, if they didn't already hear us, then they would know we did something by lookin at how Pony walked. Oh man.'_

Johnny also noticed that Pony looked happy and there was this glowing aura around him. The rumors looked to be true. Well, if Pony was happy than he should be happy too. He smiled too.

Just on time, someone came upstairs and knocked on the door. "Come downstairs. Dinner is done," Soda said.

"Ok. We'll be down in a minute," Pony shouted at the door. He kissed Johnny, wrapping his fingers in his hair and moaning at the taste of his tongue. "I really do love you, Johnny Cake," Pony whispered. "I don't care what anyone says, I'll still love you. We'll be together forever."

"I love you, too. With all of my heart. Are you ready to go downstairs?"

"Yeah." They kissed once more before heading out of the door.

* * *

All eyes were on them as they sat at the table, side by side. The whole time, Two-Bit was hystrically laughing. Sodapop had to smack him in the back of the head for him to calm down a little.

Both Ponyboy and Johnny knew that they knew but it wasn't enough to wipe the smiles off of their faces. Throughout dinner, they held hands under the table.

* * *

Afterwards, they returned to Pony's room. They were tired but happy. Striping down to boxers, they slept peacefully in each other's arms.


	2. Curtis Gang VS Society

The next day...

"Steve, can you watch the boys?" Darry asked as he was leaving.

"We don't need a babysitter, though," Pony whinned.

"Well, someone has to watch you. Who knows what you'll do while we're gone." Darry said. Everyone had plans that Sunday, except for Steve.

"I agree with the kid. Plus, Johnny can take care of both of them. They're old enough to watch themselves," Steve argued.

"No. I refuse to let them be here by themselves. Steve, you're baby-sitting. Plus you owe me. And, what I say is final."

Silence.

Nobody dared to argue against what Darry said is final. Everyone was too afraid of him.

So, Steve, Johnny, and Pony sat in the Curtis house, hating every moment. Steve was ruining any time Pony and Johnny could have together. But, it wasn't like Steve wanted to be here either. Still, he could leave if he wanted to.

_"Buzz, Buzz."_ Steve's phone vibrated. He smiled at the text. "Well, boys, sorry to leave you but I have some tail to catch. Don't get into any trouble or it's my ass that is going to get burned." He flew out of the door.

"Thank god. I thought that he would never leave," Pony said.

"Umm, Pony. Do you think we can stop by my house and get some clothes for me? I don't want to have to keep borrowing clothes from you."

"Sure. Let's go."

The boys walked around the corner to the Cade house. Entering the house, they found Johnny's mother asleep and his dad was nowhere to be found. Tip-toeing to Johnny's room, they gathered a whole bunch of clothes and stuffed them into a bag.

Pony noticed that Johnny didn't have much in his room. There was a bed, a closet of clothes and a few books laying around.

A car door slammed. "Oh shit. My dad is home. Pony, you have to go. Climb out of the window."

"No, come with me. He won't hurt you. Please just come."

"I can't. He'll be even more mad." Johnny threw his bag of clothes out of the window. "I'll meet you at your place. Just go. Please, I don't want him to see you."

"Ok." Pony left but not before kissing Johnny one last time. "Come as soon as you can."

"I'll try. Go."

"JOHNNY, YOU HOME?!" His father's loud step inched closer with every breath. Johnny watched as Pony ran home with the bag of clothes in his hand. "JOHNNY! WHERE ARE YOU, YOU LITTLE FAG?!" His father burst in Johnny's room. "DIDN'T YOU HEAR ME CALLING YOU! I-I SAW Y-YOUR BOYFRIEND RUNNING OUTSIDE."

_'Oh, god. He's drunk,'_ Johnny thought. He wouldn't have realized it until his father slurred a few of his words.

"BOY, ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING?"

"Yes, there is no need to yell. I can hear you perfectly." Opps. Johnny's new-found courage is going to cost him.

"A little sassy, aren't you. Well, I can always fix that." He got punched in the jaw. On the floor, he recieved multiple kicks. Again and again.

A small fire ignited within Johnny. He spit at his dad. "GO FUCK YOURSELF, OLD MAN."

A sinister smile plastered itself on the old man's face. He got down and said, "Why don't you?" Johnny was thrown onto his bed, face down.

"DON'T YOU DARE, OLD MAN!" Johnnny screammed.

The old man dropped his pants before dropping Johnny's. He thrusted his whole length inside Johnny, with no warnings, as rough as he could. Johnny screammed. "THAT FUCKING HURT, YOU OLD BASTARD!"

"You need to learn your place." With one hand holding Johnny's hip, the older man used his other hand to stroke Johnny. The sixteen year old hardened under his touch, but he didn't like it. _'I hate these fucking hormones. Stop getting hard. This is wrong and disgusting. Stop. Stop,'_ Johnny tried telling himself but it was no use. The only way to get through this was to pretend as if it wasn't happening. This is what he did everytime this happened.

Being raped by his father has happened longer than he could remember. It all started when his mom caught him masterbating to a picture of Pony. After that, she told his father and ever since then, they've been calling him names, saying hateful things and hurting him. Johnny knew that his father wouldn't stop until both of them came.

It felt like it was going on forever, all of the screaming from Johnny and the moans from his father until both of them came. Johnny was disgusted with himself. His father had erased any pleasure that Johnny had shared with Pony. All traces of Pony were just gone. He cried on his bed for a long time after his father had left. Shouting to his father's retreating figure he yelled, "I HATE YOU, YOU FUCKING ALCOHOLIC SON OF A BASTARD!"

"I fucking hate him," Johnny cried to himself. Later that afternoon, when the sun was setting, Johnny finally made it out of the house and to Pony's house. He was hurt real bad and there was no way for him to stop all of the bleeding.

He sat down on the porch, unnable to move anymore. The whole walk there, Johnny was conflicted with his inner self. How was he supposed to face Pony after what had just happened at his house? How was he suppose to love Pony knowing that he could easily be controlled by another? That Pony's touch was no different than anyone else's touch? _'No,'_ he told himself. _'Pony is special because he is the only one that I can return my feelings too. He is the only one that I will truly love.'_

Johnny bangged the Curtis house front door. "Pony! Help me, please."

Ponyboy came running down. "Johnny. Oh, Johnny Cake. You should've came with me. Oh god." Johnny put one arm around Pony and leaned on him as they walked upstairs. Pony laid Johnny down on his bed befoe he went to go get a first aid kit. "What happened? You were gone for so long and I was getting worried."

Roughly, Johnny kissed Pony. He wanted Pony, wanted the traces of his lover back on his skin. He wanted to get rid of all of the traces of his sin. "Pony, I love you. No matter what happens I will always love you. There is no one more beautiful or perfect than you."

"I love you too. Even with all of these wounds, you stand more beautiful than anyone else. There is only you perfect enough for me."

They kissed, furiously, wanting only each other. To touch, to taste, to have each other was all they needed in life.

Teasingly, Pony bit his the older boy's lip. Johnny moaned, but Pony mistook it as a sign of pain. "Am I hurting you, Johnny?" Pony noticed the small cut on his lip.

Johnny smiled. "The only way you could ever hurt me was if you turned away from me, or left me."

"Ok. Let's get you patched up though. Your wounds aren't so serious that you need to go to the hospital."

"Fine. Let's work and play." And that's what they did. Before wrapping Johnny up, Pony kissed each and every one of his wounds. They loved and healed each other. Somewhere inbetween it all they fell asleep, naked in each other's arms.

* * *

"What the hell?!" Sodapop yelled.

The boys woke up and tried to cover themselves with Pony's blanket. They woke up to find the whole gang (except Steve) staring at them. "Umm..well, we - we can explain," Johnny said.

"Ok. Then, explain yourselves," Darry said.

"Umm.." Silence. "There isn't really an explanation," Pony added.

"Ok, start with how Johnny got beat up all the way till now," Dallas said.

"Wait, how about we let them get dressed and then we can interogate them downstairs." It looked as if Two-Bit was the only rational one here.

"Fine. Hurry up and meet us downstairs," Darry said before shooing the gang out of the room and shutting the door behind him.

The boys stared at the door for a little while before getting up and putting on some clothes. They stole one last kiss before heading downstairs to face the gang.

* * *

The boys walked downstairs, hand in hand. No matter what the gang said, they were forever going to be together. If the gang hated them along with the rest of the world, then they would run away together. But, whatever happens they are always going to be the only ones for each other.

They sat on the couch on the oppiside side of the rest of the gang.

Darry started the coversation. "Look, we know that you like each other and -..."

"Whatever you say isn't going to seperate us. We will always be together no matter what you guys think. We'll even run away if we have to. But, you can't ever seperate us," Pony said justifiingly.

"You don't have to run away. We accept you guys because you aren't the only ones," Darry said.

The gang moved around until everyone had their arm around another or were holding hands.

"What?" The two boys were confused.

"Well, Dallas and I have been dating," Darry said.

"So have me and Two-Bit," Sodapop said.

"Everyone but Steve is dating a guy. Steve, well, he's just not ready to be tamed just yet." The gang laughed.

Everyone was happy that they didn't have to hide from each other anymore. Johnny and Pony were more than happy. They weren't alone. Now it was only the Curtis Gang against Society.

* * *

A/N: I hope that you enjoyed this story. Please leave a comment. I want to know what you think.


End file.
